7 Tips – How to Turn People Off
Love it or hate it – first impressions ARE lasting impressions. This means that the last thing you want to do is to turn someone off so quickly that they do not even want to know your name. Here are 7 ways to assure that someone will rip up your business card.
#1 – Hand them your card within the first minute of meeting them
Why? This gives the immediate impression that you are only there to see how many people you can meet and how many cards you can hand out. It shows that you have no real interest in getting to know them as a person. You are simply looking for the next sale.
#2 – Name Drop
Why? While you may think it is impressive to know this-one and that-one it is not what people want to know about you. They want to get to know YOU and not who you have schmoozed with in the past.
# 3 – Talk Talk Talk
Why? Aren’t you supposed to tell them about yourself? YES, however you are also supposed to get to know others. It’s a conversation (give and take) not a monolog (let me see how long I can talk about myself before someone interrupts).
#4 – Play coy, meek & mild
Why? No one wants to drag a conversation out of someone. It is exhausting. Even if asked a yes or no question be sure to elaborate a bit.
#5 – Push the “hot topic” buttons
Why? There is a time and place for everything. Politics, religion, your stand on legalizing marijuana and your favorite F word have no place at professional networking events.
#6 – Announce “I’M single and ready to mingle!
Why? This is a time to meet other professionals and develop G-Rated relationships that can grow into strong networks and friendships. It is NOT speed dating. Leave the “your place or mine” line at home.
#7 – Be the party animal
Why? While everyone likes a good time and a professional event does not need to be boring, keep in mind everything in moderation. Limit or avoid alcohol (tip: follow each alcoholic drink with a non-alcoholic drink), don’t treat the hors d’oeuvres as your only meal of the day (tip: be sure to eat before you arrive (which will also help with alcohol)) and for goodness sake PLEASE refrain from doing the crotch grab on the dance floor – NO ONE wants to see that!!!
Thanks for reading~
Thanksgiving is the traditional day to remember all the things that we are thankful for in our lives. We want you to know, that while we do not say it enough, we are thankful for each and every one of you on each and every day. You have shown us kindness and support beyond our wildest imagination.
It is due to this support, encouragement and love that we were able to take our dream of Red Feather Networking and make it a reality. We are so thankful to be able to use our business to help and inspire others while continuing to grow and learn on a daily basis.
We wish you, your family, friends and network an amazing holiday weekend.
Kelly and Michele
RUN! RUN! RUN!
If I were to ask you what your "gut" tells you when I mention networking I'm fairly certain it would be something along the lines of "I want to run in the other direction." Most people do not want to feel that way however I'm here to tell you that those thoughts are how the majority feel not the minority. You are not alone. Let's use our imagination for a minute. Grab a ruler and place it in front of you. This ruler represents networking. The one end represents "uncomfortable" and the other end represents "fear" or "dread". Where is your gut feeling on this spectrum? If I were a betting woman (which I am) I would say that more than 89% of you have a place on that ruler that represents your feelings. The other 11% do not fall on the ruler. A group will fall on one end and are totally comfortable with networking, actually looking forward to and/or seek out opportunities. Another group are so far off the other end of the spectrum that they liken it to death.
This month, I will be blogging on the points of the ruler and why you may feel that way. We will explore everything from the uncomfortable "but I won't know anyone there" to the "I would rather have root canal performed". Networking; Just Be Yourself blog series – certain to help you feel more comfortable and confident in all types of networking situations.
Hop on over to our Facebook page and let me know where you are on the ruler and why. Thanks for reading….
Today's guest blogger never ceases to amaze me with his ability to pull people into a conversation and make them feel at ease. Today, he gives us a glimpse into the method to his madness. Enjoy some words of wisdom from Sean McGinty.
No, I am not crazy! I am charismatic and I came to learn and network!
I attended my first ASTD International Conference & Exposition (aka ICE, the premiere conference for training professionals) in June of 2008 … it was in San Diego. I was stoked to be surrounded by my peers for 4 full days of learning. I, like most, wore slacks and a long sleeve dress shirt. It was hot and I am a self-proclaimed “Fat Sweaty Irishmen©pending”! So the networking didn’t go well, I was blown off as too young most of time. ICE 2009 D.C. in June worked out pretty much the same. In addition to being a corporate trainer, I am also a brewer and I met more brewers and reps from the SAVOR event in and around town then peers at ICE.
Fast forward to ICE 2011 in Orlando Florida, home of heat strokes and Mickey Mouse. Now I live in Florida, it’s home and this is where my light bulb moment happened. I dressed like I was going to Disney World! That right shorts, t-shirts, and tennis shoes. Now there are some guidelines to follow with this attire as with any other, think about:
- Expo size
- Comfort in the session rooms
I am a pretty outgoing guy, and like most trainers I love to talk. So here’s my secret to looking like a bum and getting away with it. Find some t-shirts that are conversation starters. This year’s biggest hit was
So if you are looking to enjoy the conference, aren’t looking for a new gig, and don’t mind the occasional stink eye, Break out the funny t-shirts and tennis shoes and I’ll see you in Dallas at ICE 2013 I’ll be the comfy guy walking around the convention center relaxed and ready to learn.
Sean McGinty is a Learning and Development Specialist for a large Law Firm Headquartered in Tampa, FL. He’s been in L&D for 12+ years and has a healthy love of Craft Beer ask any of the Red Feathers he drug through Denver. In his free time, he enjoys his family, pack of rescue dogs and is a brewer working on opening his own brewery.
Want more RFN? We'll send more info on building your network straight to your Inbox!
As promised, here is the third of three blog posts on making connections for introverts and people who suffer from shyness. In one-of-three, Through The Looking Glass, we discussed the difference between being shy and being an introvert. The two main points being:
- Being an introvert has to do with the physical part of the brain that dictates our reaction to certain situation whereas being shy is generally a psychological occurrence.
- Introverts are often very social however they have little interest in interacting with others. Those who suffer from shyness generally WANT to interact however they are fearful.In two-of-three, Overcoming Shyness: From Cocoon to Connections, we discussed methods that people who suffer from shyness can use to begin to venture into the social situations that allow connections to grow.
Now we will shift focus and address networking for introverts and for the purpose of this blog I will assume that the introvert is socially adept and not on the shy side. There is really only one point I want to address and that is the main difference between introverts and extroverts.
Extroverts not only enjoy but need to be around other people. They actually gain energy from socializing. This allows them to do so for long periods of time, often going from one event to another to another and never feeling drained of energy. Introverts actually expend energy while in social settings. While both the introvert and the extrovert may be very social and enjoy interacting socially, the physical results are very opposite. Although many introverts know HOW to network, let’s explore ways that an introvert can successfully make connections despite their energy for engagement limitations. In order for introverts to get the most of their “connecting” time I would highly suggest that making a plan be top on the list. Here is what I mean about that:
- Plan what events or activities you will attend. Since you are not the extrovert that can go, go, go you need to make choices. If you are attending a large convention or simply have many social opportunities during your normal work week, it’s important to pick and choose those that will be most beneficial to you and not try to push yourself to attend all. It’s more important to be at YOUR best for a handful of events vs being so-so at all the events.
- Plan to attend at peak times. If some events go for many many hours – plan accordingly. Unlike shy people who should arrive early (in order to not arrive when the event is in full swing) and stay for the duration (exposure to social events is a big plus), introverts need to plan to arrive later if possible and leave as the peak of the event is winding down.
- Plan for down time if you are not able to pick and choose your events or the hours in which you can attend. Many introverts just need to recharge their batteries with some quiet time. If you are required to attend a large function for work and you must be there from start to finish, be sure to allow yourself a little “me” time. If your cell phone battery was dying you would find an outlet and plug it in for a few minutes. Well the same goes for you. Unfortunately, people do not come with little “bars” that tell us when our battery is getting low so you have to listen to your internal self. Take a minute to take a walk outside for fresh air. Excuse yourself to the restroom however don’t use the one right outside the meeting room door. Stroll down a few hallways until you find one a bit removed from the action. Do these as often as you need to keep on your game.
- Plan for after events. Many meetings or events have something happening after all the scheduled activities are done. After events are excellent times to make connections on a more relaxed level so it’s highly encouraged that you participate. This does not mean you need to run directly from the meeting to the after event. Find out where it will be held, excuse yourself to your hotel or your home for an hour in order to recharge and then meet up with the others.
- Plan down time post-event. If possible allow several days in between events. Many introverts feel drained and emotionally exhausted following an event so allowing some down time is very important.The key is to recognize your limitations. Recognize when you are starting to feel depleted of energy and allow yourself to recharge. It is far better to make a smaller number of quality connections while you are at your peak than to make a greater number of so-so connections while you are running on empty.
If you found this blog helpful, I encourage you to sign up for our email list, send us a note, or comment on our Facebook page. Share with your tweeps on Twitter, LinkedIn or Google + by simply clicking the links at the top of this post. ALSO — If you have any comments or suggestions for future posts that you would be interested in hearing about please leave your comments below.